The Mask You Live In

by Alana Thomas

The Mask You Live In, directed by Jennifer Siebel Newsom, dissects modern masculinity and the effects it has on boys as well as everyone else in our society.

The films use of gripping anecdotes and in depth conversations about hyper-masculinity and the affects it has on our society really display the message of this documentary.

The film begins to explain how parents and surrounding influences tell young boys not to express emotions because emotions mean you’re “soft” and “feminine,” and that as a man these things are unacceptable. The only emotion men are able to show without judgment from peers is anger. What we get by setting these standards is a generation of boys that are unable to express their emotions in a healthy way. Sadness and grief are turned into acts of violence and aggression because being sad makes you vulnerable, and “men aren’t supposed to be vulnerable”. In the film, former NFL defensive lineman, Joe Erhmann, says “be a man…that’s one of the most destructive phrases in our culture.” Erhmann says this because that phrase is typically used to cut off a natural expression of an emotion, which is dangerous in the development of boys.

Another interesting topic discussed in The Mask You Live In is the role that sports and coaches play in the development of young boys. Often on sports fields coaches and players alike use language that’s harmful and discouraging. “Be a man”, “stop crying”, “take it like a man”, “what are you a little girl?”, ”don’t be such a f*ggot”. The nature of this language cultivates homophobia and sexism. The same boys that are affected by this language become our fathers and our community leaders. The cycle repeats itself and these same values are passed on to the next generation. The way people view masculinity also directly impacts the way we view women and femininity. As men are expected to become stronger, women are expected to become more submissive and to perform as the weaker vessel, because of the idea that men are supposed to be in control.

In the documentary, a psychologist, Dr. Niobe Way says, “If we’re in a culture that doesn’t value caring, doesn’t value relationships, doesn’t value empathy, you are going to have boys and girls, men and women, go crazy.” Here, Dr. Niobe is explaining how the cultivation of hyper-masculinity affects both men, and women. Continuing to cultivate hyper-masculinity in men will be damaging to the well-being of our future generations, which is why we must become more conscious in  the way we cultivate masculinity.  

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Go here for further insight on The Mask You Live In.